05 Apr 1996 - Lusaka, Zambia
A woman scratches a lion through metal bars. Inside the house, there are more
metal bars; the lion lives in the house too. At 4:30 in the morning, you are
awoken by a soft but deep guttural roar. I have landed in a field with cows and
tall grass; it is also the airstrip. I don't know if I am welcome here; I
couldn't find any phones that worked, so I just came.
The last time I was here, there were several lions and a tiger; it was louder
then. David Irwin was a friend. We had stopped to visit while working on a film
about elephants called "Ivory Wars," and I had never seen such a house. There
was a jungle growing inside - a real one - with a stream flowing through. All
along the white walls were eyes staring back; there were dozens of wildlife
trophies, even a black rhino. We had sat in the bar together. There would be a
sharp musty smell. If you looked over your shoulder, you would see that one of
the lions had just joined you a few feet away - but behind bars. In another room
there would be a tiger. There were many levels, and as you climbed up through
the inside of the house, you could look down on the jungle and all of the levels
and eyes below.
David was a journalist, but his passion was flying. I guess that was what
kept us in touch with each other for some time. He was one of those gentle and
very kind people who make you feel welcome in a foreign place, and then I didn't
hear from him anymore. I think he had been flying the beaver, his favorite
plane, and was driving home. It was that place on the road by the bend, just
before it turns to dirt and potholes; he hit an army truck. It was dark; the
truck had no lights, and he was killed.
I am at that place on the road by the bend. I have spent the day in Lusaka
with my friend Andrew. I had to get an x-ray. A horse fell on me in Zimbabwe six
weeks ago in a dramatic way, and it has been hurting a bit since then. I asked
Andrew to look at my back. He said, "one of the bumps is missing," so we decided
that an x-ray must be the answer. I don't think my father or my brother approve
of my medical philosophy of fix-it-yourself; they are both in the business of
health care. My father has taken out a $200,000 life insurance policy on me. I
can't imagine that I am worth that much.
In Lusaka, we drive through an intersection. Two very fat lady police
officers come up to us and tell us they are getting into the car. "You have
committed an offense," they say. I am not driving, so I defer to Andrew. "What
is the offense?" asks Andrew. "No, you just drive on; you are blocking traffic,"
they say. Andrew is from South Africa and is a bit new at this game, but it
should be good practice for him. "You know, you have driven through a red
light," they say; "this is a very serious offense." I am quietly looking at all
the traffic lights. I can't find one that is operating. If the green glass
hasn't been stolen to break up and sell as black market emeralds, then there
just seems to be no electricity. "You must take us to the police station," they
say; "you are going to be fined 150,000 Kwacha and go to prison for 24 hours." A
hundred and fifty US Dollars sounds a little steep for a Lusaka driving offense,
and Andrew is supposed to be leaving for Mocambique in the afternoon to go and
look for real emeralds. "First, I have to buy some film," Andrew says. I am very
impressed at this time-buying tactic. In the shop, Andrew begins to hand me
fistfuls of Kwacha in rubber-banded packets. "Here, hold this," he says. This is
supposed to strengthen his bargaining position to one of poverty. I fill up my
plastic bag with the countless bundles of money and look at all the eyes
watching me. I feel like a mini-Rambo about to charge a heavily fortified
position without a machine gun. The bush telegraph works especially quickly in
the streets of Lusaka. Cha cha cha road is probably the most famous for getting
mugged; everybody knows how much money you have. We pull into a petrol station,
and Andrew lifts the hood (or bonnet) to pull the distributor cap off. "Ah, I
don't know what has happened, but the car is not working now," he says; "I think
maybe in 4 or 5 hours maybe they can do something to fix it, so we can just
wait." Andrew begins to be very sad and to tell them how going to jail is going
to ruin his life. He has never committed such an offense before, and his family
is going to be very disappointed with him. I am quietly amused at the success of
this sad strategy. The large officers are becoming less content. Perhaps, this
sad story of life might go on for the next 4 or 5 hours. They suggest that maybe
this should just be a warning, because they can now see that he is sorry for his
offense. Andrew gives the officers 15,000 Kwacha to thank them for their
warning, and they walk off into the hot afternoon sun to look for more lucrative
offenders.
We celebrate with a Fanta. A Locust crawls across the counter of this small
shop. I am told that it is a "chukanono" and start joking that I would like to
eat it. The joke is not taken in the correct way, and there is hardly a pause
before the lady grabs it, rips its wings off, and drops the fat bug in a pan of
hot cooking oil. There are several quizzical eyes on me now. I politely turn the
conversation to whether many people eat chukanonos in Zambia. "Yes, we eat
them," I am told. My chukanono arrives brown and crispy dripping with oil in
front of me, so I eat it. My x-rays come back, and they look fine to me; the
doctor thinks so too, so I am on my way back to the house with the lion.
It is after that place on the road by the bend; the road has turned to dirt.
It is dark, and I have missed the turn to the farm and the house with the lion.
I turn around by a sign in the middle of the road that says, "neighborhood
watch." I am suspicious of signs like this in the African night, for this is the
favorite way of thieves to seize your car. I am surprised to hear the two
popping sounds; they sound like toy guns. I look as I turn and see two figures
with AK-47s running toward me. Their figures are only shadows in the dusty
light, but they are form enough for me to realize that something is not right. I
turn off my lights and race into darkness. There are 15 more pops, maybe more;
some are bursts, and some are alone. I splash through a pool of water which I
cannot see and disappear into darkness to that place on the road by the bend.
I am not really shocked by this. I look at my hand; it is not shaking. I turn
around and this time do not miss the turn to the house with the lion. The gate
is locked, and the man with wide spaces in his teeth does not have the key. He
tells me that I must use the other entrance past the police road block. "Are
those police?" I ask. "Yes," I am told. Perhaps, thirty minutes has passed, and
I drive up to a neighborhood watch road block. There is a vast amount of
confusion like bees out of a nest looking for someone to sting. Some guys are
wearing military uniforms with orange berets; some guys are wearing unbuttoned
shirts. They are all carrying around machine guns. It smells like burnt
gunpowder. There is a fat bald guy on a radio and a vehicle with flashing
lights. I am desperate to ask questions, but instead I ask directions. I drive
for a long time down a dusty road wondering if they were trying to hit me or to
scare me into stopping. Neither answer seems more real than the other. I
eventually find a dusty turnoff in the dark and follow the road into the farm.
At the house there is a black mamba hidden next to the step. The house boy
arrives to open the house. I say, "what is it?" He says, "a snake." I say, "is
it bad." He says, "yes." I say, "should we kill it." He says, "yes." I don't
want to do this; he is not aggressive, but I don't pause to think. I put a stick
by its mouth; my adrenaline is pumping. The inside of the mouth is black; as it
strikes the stick, I push down and crush its head until nothing moves.
In October of last year in
Lusaka, some thieves hijacked a Norwegian's car and kidnapped him. His friend
called the police, and there was a chase. At one point, the thieves threw their
captive out of the car. The police drove up to the Norwegian and shot him. He
was then taken to a state hospital where he was put on hold. The following day
it was too late, and his leg was amputated. I think, in the place where I come
from, we are too naive to believe that someone will shoot at you - especially if
you haven't done anything wrong. I come from a protected place, and in different
places, there are different rules. I drive back to the neighborhood watch road
block in the daylight. There are four men there. The words "Msasa Police Post"
have been scratched with a piece of charcoal on a concrete wall. They are decent
men. We take a photo together and talk of America and about a "stolen" car from
the night before. They fired two shots in the air when it was at 30 meters, but
it didn't stop, so they fired at it until it reached a pool of water 200 meters
down the road. They were not successful, they said, because it got away. I shake
my head and smile, but then I think of the snake - how similar we were - and the
smile goes away. One just luckier than the other.
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Tom Claytor